Thursday, October 28, 2010

I'm feeling much better today and was able to get some working out in, which just makes me feel better overall. I don't know if one day the RSD will spread to my arms or hands, I mean it already spread from my left knee to my right one, so I realize the importance not taking anything for granted. Now I can do things like boxing which is still a cardiac workout that is ok on my knees, but maybe one day I won't be able to. Or maybe I always will be able to too (looking at the bright side :) ). Either way, I know the importance of living each day doing what I can, so I won't regret not doing it if I can't later. Does that make sense?

As my knees have continued to get worse over the last year and a half, I have noticed all the things that I took for granted before that I now can't do. Like kneel down at all. Or be able to go the mall without horrible pain for the next few days after. Or be able to wear whatever shoes I want. I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

Sometimes I do feel bad for myself when I'm bound to the couch, missing the freedom I used to have that was taken from me. In this way it's very similar to celiac disease as well. And I'll admit that sometimes I do feel bad for myself with that too, wishing I could eat birthday cake with everyone else or be able to order whatever I want from a menu. But I can't let these feelings stay too long. And neither can you. If you dwell on the past, you miss out on the present. And that just leads to more lamenting of the past gone by, with regrets this time. It's a horrible cycle that no one should live in. I'm not saying it's easy to focus on the positives when there are things you love that you miss out on now. It's something that takes focus and determination. But if you want to be happy, it's possible for you.

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